Why must you insist on kicking your kitty litter all over the bathroom? In all honesty it’s just rude, you don’t see me splashing my toilet water all over your litter box do you? Secondly just because the kitty litter is now out of the litter box, that does not give you the right to do your business outside of the litter box. I find your actions rude and insulting and I write this letter to inform you that due to your indecent behaviour we will not be snuggling tonight.
(The person who might I need remind you, adopted you from a shelter where you were living with 7 other cats, all of whom you showed hatred for, also the person that despite the fact that at 7 months old you had already had 3 owners due to your bitchiness, still adopted you and who didn’t take you back even when after 6 months of living in my bedroom you still insisted on biting me every night before bed.)